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Wednesday, August 31, 2005
Far away from Neverland
Michael Jackson loves those Arabs ... and, apparently, also speedboats.
posted by Benyamin | 9:32 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Tuesday, August 30, 2005
Mad in Munich

Yeah, he's made E.T. and Schindler's List, but it seems not everyone is a fan of Steven Spielberg. The director is currently in Budapest filming Munich, a movie about the 1972 massacre of Israeli Olympians at the hands of Palestinian terrorists. Spielberg, who's trying to keep the set top-secret, is towing cars parked near the set and getting upset with shutter-happy local photographers. One source said: "The best part is [Spielberg's people] keep saying, 'This is the biggest thing ever to happen to Budapest,' which is true if you discount the whole Roman and Ottoman Empires, World Wars I and II, the fall of communism and the European Union's accession. Of course, every time they say this, the Hungarians double the price of their goulash ... Maybe if the rumor about Brad Pitt's being in the movie were true, people would be more friendly."
posted by Benyamin | 3:43 PM | Link | (0) comments |
The vagina monologues
Britney's birthing canal may enter into a cesspool of Kabbalah water. Mystics of the world were seen celebrating at the news.
posted by Benyamin | 3:31 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Dylan overload

Rocker Bob Dylan has gone from Jew to Jesus freak to Jew again. And fans of the legendary singer have reason to celebrate this week. He's got a new CD out today, available only at Starbucks. He's got another CD that dropped today as well. And, in late September, PBS will air the long-awaited Martin Scorsese Dylan documentary. Well, he's come a long way from hawking bras.
posted by Benyamin | 1:50 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Friday, August 26, 2005
Is she playing an Indian in her next role?

Hoping to be taken seriously as a devil-may-care actress, Natalie Portman continues to stun adolescent Jewish boys with her ever changing hairdo (or, more recently, the lack thereof). First there was the bald cut, now comes the full on mohawk.
posted by Benyamin | 10:49 AM | Link | (0) comments |
And now a word from our sponsor
God good. Stem cell commercials bad.
posted by Benyamin | 10:04 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Mickey sleeps with Jesus

When Disney releases their animated Christmas DVD The 3 Wise Men, there'll only be one place to get it: Wal-Mart. What's interesting is not that the super chain is using its enormous clout to the be the exclusive retailer of the flick, but that Disney is using Wal-Mart -- who's core demographic is Christian families -- to sell their Christmas story. Does that mean we could get an exclusive on a Chanukah cartoon at our local Judaica store?
posted by Benyamin | 9:38 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Thursday, August 25, 2005
Jerry, look at the bay-bee!!!
Mazal Tov to Jerry and Jessica Seinfeld on the birth of their third child, Shepherd Kellen Seinfeld. The boy was born on Monday so we guess they're not waiting a week to have the bris and baby-naming.
posted by Benyamin | 3:17 PM | Link | (0) comments |
The latest in Scarletgate
Our favorite Jewish actress of the moment is cool, calm, and collected. But we already knew that.
posted by Benyamin | 3:16 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Wednesday, August 24, 2005
Pam & Borat. Need we say more?

Ali G (aka British comedian Sacha Baron Cohen) was thrown into the ocean by Pamela Anderson's bodyguards after he attempted to tackle the actress during the beachside wedding ceremony of her two dogs, Star and Luca. Cohen, who was filming a skit, was dressed as his now infamous Borat character. Oh God, we can hardly wait for the new season to begin on HBO.
posted by Benyamin | 9:42 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Portman's next Jewy flick
Following her violent turn in the now postponed V for Vendetta, Natalie Portman has signed on to be in director Milos Forman's new film Goya's Ghosts, which tells the story of the last years of the Spanish Inquisition, when the Church tortured and executed suspected Jews. Glad to see she's not doing any more Star Wars flicks.
posted by Benyamin | 9:39 AM | Link | (1) comments |
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Mel moves on

Mel Brooks seems to be healing his wounds after the passing of his wife earlier this summer. When not working on the film version of The Producers (due out later this year), the legendary filmmaker has been spending a lot of time at French Roast, a 24-hour Greenwich Village cafe kicking back with the customers. The New York Post reports: "The creator of The Producers was approached by a woman who offered condolences on the passing of his beloved wife, Anne Bancroft. "I know how you feel. I just lost my mother," the woman said. "How old was she?" asked Mel. "Ninety-six," the woman replied. "Well," said Mel, "she was asking for it."
posted by Benyamin | 9:58 AM | Link | (0) comments |
The 37-year-old virgin
The case for Judd Apatow, the Kevin Bacon of comedy.
posted by Benyamin | 9:48 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Chasing Amy ... er, Scarlett
We beg of you. Will the paparazzi please stop chasing hot Jewish actresses? Please, leave that to us.
posted by Benyamin | 9:47 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Monday, August 22, 2005
Portman postponed
The November release date of Natalie Portman's sci-fi flick V for Vendetta, which features a London bombing, is being postponed until March 2006 because Warner Brothers execs feel it's too soon for the public to see terrorism in London portrayed on the big screen. We just don't get it: Wouldn't the real-life similarities help the movie's box office?
posted by Benyamin | 1:19 PM | Link | (0) comments |
One of these things is not like the other

Shimon Peres will appear on MTV along with Martha Stewart, Kanye West, and Melissa Etheridge. The strange bedfellows are teaming up for mtvU's Stand In, a show where celebrities are surprise university lecturers. Musicians on college campuses seems to be a growing trend. First, Tommy Lee did it for NBC and now KISS' Gene Simmons is doing it for his new VH1 series Rock School. While Peres will teach students about the politics of the Middle East, we can only assume Stewart will deliver a rendition of her "Stay in school, Stay out of jail" speech.
posted by Benyamin | 11:50 AM | Link | (0) comments |
She always looked a little sick and gangly

American Pie actress Natasha Lyonne (known to many for her rude apartment habits) is fighting for her life in a New York hospital allegedly coping with hepatitis C, a heart infection, and a collapsed lung. Her dad told Access Hollywood that his daughter contracted the potentially deadly disease while shooting the 2001 Holocaust drama The Grey Zone in Bulgaria. Great. Blame everything on the Holocaust.
posted by Benyamin | 10:00 AM | Link | (1) comments |
Turner and Hooch
First Tom Cruise, and now Kathleen Turner. What is this world coming to?
posted by Benyamin | 9:26 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Thursday, August 18, 2005
Toon in
A Borscht-Belt inspired cartoon. We're getting there, people.
posted by Benyamin | 12:31 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Madonna tells Brit to give tzedakah
Before injuring herself from a horse riding accident this week, Madonna convinced fellow Kabbalah devotee to donate more than $30,000 to the Spirituality for Kids organization, a non-profit offshoot of the Kabbalah Centre. And speaking of kids and offshoots, Britney's baby is due next month.

[A program note:] We apologize for the slow posting as of late. We're on deadline getting the new print edition sent to the printer and will be back to regular daily posting next week. We appreciate your patience.
posted by Benyamin | 9:03 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Thursday, August 11, 2005
The return of Schindler?
Steven Spielberg and Liam Neeson are teaming up again -- not for Schindler's List II: Return of the Nazis, but for an Abe Lincoln biopic. Hopefully Spielberg can find a role in the flick for Ben Kingsley as well.
posted by Benyamin | 12:53 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
Baruch dayan haemet
Eccentric entrepreneur Abe Hirschfeld has gone to the parking lot in the sky.
posted by Benyamin | 11:50 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Setting the trend
Fashion outlet Abercrombie & Fitch has joined up with, of all groups, the Anti-Defamation League to create "innovative anti-bias programs" for college campuses this fall. Yeah, that's a great idea. Because when we see the cool kids all wearing hip A&F clothes, the last thing on our mind is exclusion.
posted by Benyamin | 11:40 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Tuesday, August 09, 2005
More Scarlett boob news

Jewish starlet Scarlett Johansson can't seem to get enough of her breasts these days. Last month, we reported that an oversized version of them on a billboard almost caused Johansson to get in a car wreck. Now, she says she wanted her Island director Michael Bay to allow her to go topless in the action flick. "I said, 'Women don't normally sleep in a bra. I can't wake up in this scene wearing a bra, it's ridiculous,'" Johansson recalled. Unfortunately, Bay got his way in the end. And, in other boob news, Jessica Simpson swears hers are all true Grade A.
posted by Benyamin | 1:08 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Band Aid

A bandage that Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon wore during the 1973 Yom Kippur War is for sale on eBay. Yummy. At least it's not as insensitive as the sudden glut of Peter Jennings paraphernalia now up for auction.
posted by Benyamin | 10:21 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Battle of the Kabbalah stars
And the Kabbalah gravy train rolls on. Madonna and husband Guy Ritchie were photographed having a "serious disagreement" outside of the Los Angeles branch of the Kabbalah Centre. Perhaps, and we can only hope here, they were calling each other glib.
posted by Benyamin | 9:44 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Monday, August 08, 2005
Tattoo Jew

This doesn't make any sense. In deference to their interest in Kabbalah, Victoria and David Beckham have reportedly gotten matching Hebrew tattoos. But doesn't the Torah say it's prohibited to get a tattoo?

[Update:] Holy crap! David Beckham is Jewish.
posted by Benyamin | 11:12 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Thursday, August 04, 2005
Kabbalah or die
Apparently you can get death threats for writing bad stuff about the controversial Kabbalah Centre. Um, we'd better watch out.
posted by Benyamin | 4:20 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Wednesday, August 03, 2005
Two gays, one shtetl

Stop the presses. Rosie O'Donnell may be set to forever screw up alter our vision of the ultimate babushke. The New York Post is reporting that the former talk show queen turned famous lesbian may step into the shtetl shoes of Golde opposite Harvey Fierstein (also openly gay) in the Broadway production of Fiddler on the Roof next month. It was a late night last night. Please insert your own joke here.
posted by Benyamin | 10:31 AM | Link | (0) comments |
The seventh bride
Anyone know why this wedding is not on onlysimchas?
posted by Benyamin | 10:27 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Vagina Monlogues, meet your match

From Reuters:
Rafael Milo-Amar said Tuesday that his one-man show, "The Holy Phallus," was inspired by a disparaging remark one of the Israeli actresses in the local production of Eve Ensler's celebrated play had made about the male member.

"She said there was nothing to say about the penis. I told myself, 'I have something to tell her about the penis'," Milo-Amar told the Jerusalem Post.

According to the newspaper, The Holy Phallus is an extended monologue touching on rape, passion, handicaps, homosexuality and loneliness. A public relations agent for the play said it does not involve nudity.

Oh those silly secular Israelis. And they think the haredim are bad for the Jews.
posted by Benyamin | 10:16 AM | Link | (0) comments |
I want my Arab TV
The Arab version of The View (yes, there is one) is helping break down stereotypes about Muslims. Hey, between that show and Ricky Martin's latest efforts, we'd say they've got a bonified PR campaign going on here. (Sarcasm, quite obviously, duly noted.)
posted by Benyamin | 10:03 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Tuesday, August 02, 2005
The stork report
Mazal tov to Ben Stiller and wife Christine Taylor on the birth second child, a son named Quinlin Dempsey Stiller. Good to see they're using a Jewish name.
posted by Benyamin | 9:39 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Monday, August 01, 2005
Cruise control
It appears that even Scientology officials are getting tired of Tom Cruise's wild antics.
posted by Benyamin | 9:35 AM | Link | (1) comments |
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