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Thursday, June 30, 2005
Morgan's Muslim

Finally. Last night (and I'm sure half a dozen more times throughout the next week), we got to see "The Muslim Episode" of Morgan Spurlock's guilty pleasure of a show 30 Days. Discuss.
posted by Benyamin | 3:51 PM | Link | (50) comments |
Mel's memorial
Mel Brooks held a memorial for his late wife Anne Bancroft for about 100 of his closest friends including Pail Simon, Alan Alda, Nathan Lane, Matthew Broderick, and Patty Duke. "If any of you are grieving, keep it to yourself," Brooks told the crowd. "I don't want to hear it."
posted by Benyamin | 12:38 PM | Link | (2) comments |
Kindergarten Cop
Israeli style.
posted by Benyamin | 11:02 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Here we call it soccer
New York Giants running back Tiki Barber met with Shimon Peres this week in Israel. Whew ... so we can finally have peace between Israelis and NFL players. That was a close one.
posted by Benyamin | 10:59 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Wednesday, June 29, 2005
E.T. meet Tom
Ok, we know Tom Cruise has some wild beliefs, but the star of Spielberg's new War of the Worlds told a German newspaper that he believes in aliens. Asked if they exist, Cruise replied: "Yes, of course. Are you really so arrogant as to believe we are alone in this universe?" And the Tom Cruise Crazy Train rolls on.
posted by Benyamin | 9:30 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Head case
Word has it that Madonna has designed a yarmulke for her husband. Ever the marketers, the Kabbalah Centre may try mass producing a version of it for the public. Seriously.
posted by Benyamin | 9:14 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
Ho hum history
Woody Allen is so over the tragic events of 9/11. He tells Der Spiegel Magazine: "As a filmmaker, I'm not interested in 9/11 ... it's too small, history overwhelms it. The history of the world is like: He kills me, I kill him, only with different cosmetics and different castings. So in 2001, some fanatics killed some Americans, and now some Americans are killing some Iraqis. And in my childhood, some Nazis killed Jews. And now, some Jewish people and some Palestinians are killing each other. Political questions, if you go back thousands of years, are ephemeral, not important. History is the same thing over and over again."
posted by Benyamin | 12:10 PM | Link | (1) comments |
Sarah's passion of the Christ
Yes, there is a God. And we're not talking about Jesus ... although that's what crass comedian Sarah SIlverman will be talking about when her hit concert "Jesus is Magic" makes its way to the big screen this November. Distributor Roadside Attractions announced Monday that it would be releasing the film in theaters.

If you just can't wait till November to hear her riff on the son of God, here are two of our favorite Silverman one-liners to keep you occupied: "As a teenager I was molested by a doctor." Pause. "Which for a Jewish girl is, you know, so bittersweet." And another: "So there I was licking jelly off my boyfriend." Pause. "And I thought: Oh my God, I'm turning into my mother!"
posted by Benyamin | 10:22 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Friday, June 24, 2005
Cross currents
A Star of David, with its six points, would've conducted more electricity.
posted by Benyamin | 12:47 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Mystical madness
Radar Magazine wraps up its compelling and comprehensive four-part series on the shady business dealings of the Kabbalah Centre. Most disturbing trend: While we all know that the Berg Family and the Kabbalah they spew is a bit wacky, you would think that with all their money they could afford to be a little more professional and polished. I mean, c'mon, with all the ridiculous things this article alleges (plagiarism, a cure for AIDS, and the vast amounts of money they take for themselves), how hard would it be for the multi-million dollar Kabbalah Centre to hire a PR person to come across as something more than just a bumbling buffoon?
posted by Benyamin | 11:40 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Scientology: The fast and the furious
Thanks to the recent media blitz of Tom Cruise, Scientology has become "one of the fastest growing religions on Earth." As well, the search engine Lycos reported that "Scientology" had leaped into the top 50 search terms last week for the first time, hitting 37, marking a 260 percent increase in interest. Meanwhile, searches for Tom's sanity have still proven unsuccessful.
posted by Benyamin | 9:47 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
No late fees ... but there is another price to pay
We guess wearing your yarmulke in public is worth all the weird stares you may get. Leonard Teplitsky, who was fired from Blockbuster for donning the religious accoutrement, has just received a $50,000 settlement from a religious discrimination suit he brought against the video giant. He also, we're told, is going to receive a year's worth of free rentals.
posted by Benyamin | 10:56 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Last comic standing
Looks like Rodney Dangerfield is finally getting some respect.
posted by Benyamin | 10:54 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
The voice of reason
The London Mirror is reporting that Britney Spears will be the voice of Binah in the animated film adaptation of Madonna's Kabbalah kid's book English Roses. Binah is Hebrew for "understanding" or "knowledge" which, I think we can all agree, fits Brit just perfectly.
posted by Benyamin | 9:38 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Monday, June 20, 2005
A rush to the head
Actor Geoffrey Rush (Shine) has joined Steven Spielberg's production of his as-yet-untitled Munich Olympic project which follows the aftermath of Palestinian exremesists slaying members of the Israeli team. From our previous post, we would assume CBS would be nowehere near this set.
posted by Benyamin | 10:16 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Unraveling the Jewish gayish mafia
Rumor has it that CBS was trying to keep Jews and gays away from working on their upcoming miniseries about the late Pope John Paul II. Wait, so let me get this straight: You want to ged rid of all the Jews and gays who work on a movie? So then who's gonna direct, produce, act, and put the makeup on?
posted by Benyamin | 9:38 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Escaping Cruise's clutches
Scarlett Johansson, our new favorite Jewish starlet apparently backed out of Mission Impossible: 3 because Tommy boy was pressuring her to convert to Scientology. Can we please just sic a bearded and brash Lubavitch missionary on Cruise so he'll stay away from our women?
posted by Benyamin | 9:16 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Friday, June 17, 2005
Michael tell-all
Rabbi Shmuley Boteach is claiming to have more than 30 hours of taped conversations with Michael Jackson from when he served as the embattled singer's spritual advisor. According to Boteach, Michael wanted the rabbi to write a book about him. And now that Jackson has been found innocent (and is ergo ok to be linked to again) Boteach's book and all of its revelations may finally see the light of day.
posted by Benyamin | 12:22 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Thursday, June 16, 2005
Kabbalah Centre: Just do it
Everyone in the Jewish blogosphere seems to be yapping today about Radar Online's (upcoming) investigative report on the Kabbalah Centre. As Defamer correctly points out The New Republic and half a dozen other venerable publications have already done such reporting, yet Radar claims to have some original juicy tidbits including this nugget: "The Centre's solicitation of freelance ghostwriters on the website Craigslist, to help the Bergs write “scholarly” books on Kabbalah, some of which the writers are encouraged to model on new-age best-sellers." Interesting, but nobody seems to be the one question still on everyone's minds: Why the heck to they use the pseudo-intellectual holier-than-thou spelling of "Centre"? Oh, think we just answered our own question.
posted by Benyamin | 4:58 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Royal pain
Allegedly, Queen Latifah's bodyguards are anti-Semitic. Who knew?
posted by Benyamin | 2:06 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Bob Dylan Dot Com
First he was hawking bras and panties for Victoria's Secret. Now, the penultimate Jewish rocker is shilling for Amazon.com.
posted by Benyamin | 1:30 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Mystical Jacko
Just what we need. Apparently Michael Jackson may be replacing Madonna as the official Kabbalah spokesperson.
posted by Benyamin | 1:22 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Wednesday, June 15, 2005
Getting 'Lucky'
The Weinstein brothers, formerly of Miramax, have agreed to use their new company to release Lucky Number Slevin starring Bruce Willis, Josh Hartnett, and Lucy Liu. The film chronicles the rivalry between Jewish and African American mobsters. Take that, Bugsy.
posted by Benyamin | 4:38 PM | Link | (0) comments |
SimGaza
Ever wish you could virtually remove West Bank settlements? Isn't the Internet great?
posted by Benyamin | 1:10 PM | Link | (0) comments |
And another one bites the dust
First it was the engagement of hot Jewish actress Rachel Weisz who had single Jewish men everywhere up in arms. Now comes word that everyone's favorite Scooby Doo actress (sorry, Sarah Michelle) has gotten married. Alicia Silverstone (Clueless, Beauty Shop) wed longtime musician boyfriend Christopher Jarecki in Lake Tahoe on Saturday. We just hope the marriage last longer than Miss Match.
posted by Benyamin | 10:37 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Friday, June 10, 2005
Mazar's mazal
Entourage actress Debi Mazar has got to have the strangest heritage we've seen in a long time. In an interview with New York magazine, the friend of Madonna explains her grab-bag geneaology: She says her mother "was born Catholic, converted to Judaism, then she became a Buddhist, then she became a Jehovah's Witness. Then she was kicked out of Jehovah's Witness for taking a blood transfusion because her at-home birth went south, and she was gonna die. Because she lived to tell, they publicly humiliated her." Mazar's father was born Jewish, but was raised as a Catholic and hidden during WWII. Word is the Mormons are upset they weren't mentioned.
posted by Benyamin | 9:55 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Jon Stewart: The Sequel
We've just heard news that Jon Stewart has signed a hush-hush deal with Warner Books for a follow-up book to his best-selling tome America (The Book:) A Citizen's Guide to Democracy Inaction. If it's even half as good as the first, we can hardly wait.
posted by Benyamin | 9:38 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Emmy winner
Phantom of the Opera hottie Emmy Rossum may be engaged. And, in a related story, we may care.
posted by Benyamin | 9:36 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Thursday, June 09, 2005
Jolie's Judaism
We caught a press screening of the new "Brangelina" action-comedy flick Mr. & Mrs. Smith. During a seminal point in the film, when the couple realize they have both been lying to each other, Jolie's character admits a shocker to hubby Pitt: "One more thing," she says. "I'm Jewish."
posted by Benyamin | 12:16 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Second chances
Lindsay Lohan's dad, currently serving jail time for various charges including drunk driving, says that when he gets released he may want to become a minister. Isn't religion grand?
posted by Benyamin | 12:10 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Wednesday, June 08, 2005
Cruise control
Tom Cruise somehow manages to compare his beloved Scientology to burning synagogues. This guy has really flew the coop.
posted by Benyamin | 1:29 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Another one bites the dust
We regret to inform you that everyone's favorite British Yid, Rachel Weisz, is no longer single. Damn you, Aronofsky, damn you!
posted by Benyamin | 12:23 PM | Link | (0) comments |
More Madonna
Madonna released her fifth and final Kabbalah kid's book this week to little fanfare. Maybe she should think about switching careers or reinventing herself ... again.
posted by Benyamin | 11:28 AM | Link | (0) comments |
The world's mayor
Rudy Giuliani is looking for work ... in Israel.
posted by Benyamin | 11:01 AM | Link | (0) comments |
They said it
"I am thrilled to be here and I also have an announcement: I too am head-over-heels in love with Katie Holmes. I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love." -- Billy Crystal, who collected the Tony for best special theatrical event for his one-man show, 700 Sundays.
posted by Benyamin | 10:37 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Baruch dayan haemet
We mourn the loss today of Mel Brooks' wife, Anne Bancroft.
posted by Benyamin | 9:43 AM | Link | (0) comments |
C.S.I: Jesus
An Israeli researcher claims the Crucifixion caused by a pulmonary embolism, not a fatal blood loss in Jesus. And the importance of this discovery would be?
posted by Benyamin | 9:07 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Friday, June 03, 2005
The Wonkanator
Gene Wilder, the original Willy Wonka, is not too happy with the new Johnny Depp remake. "It's just some people sitting around thinking: 'How can we make some more money?' Why else would you remake Willy Wonka?," he asks. As well, Wilder has gotten so fed up with the movie business that he's picked up and left Hollywood. "It would have ruined me personally," he says. "It would have taken my soul."
posted by Benyamin | 9:58 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Ew...
Jerry Springer has a crush on Natalie Portman. At least their kids would grow up Jewish.
posted by Benyamin | 9:54 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Bible blasphemy
Holy sh*t.
posted by Benyamin | 9:47 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Wednesday, June 01, 2005
Paris is falling
Paris Hilton, who just got engaged to a guy named Paris, will probably not have a Kabbalah infused wedding ceremony despite her previous affinity for the Jewish cult. "Paris, like a lot of trend-following celebrities, seems to be moving away from Kabbalah," Rick Ross of Cultnews.com tells MSNBC. "The pop craze over the Kabbalah Centre may have passed and despite the group's energy drink, it may be running out of gas." He goes on to say that Kabbalah hasn't helped celebs' careers. For the love of God, can someone please explain to me what exactly Paris Hilton's career is?
posted by Benyamin | 8:54 AM | Link | (0) comments |
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