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Thursday, April 29, 2004
Now With Walk-On-Water Action!

Peep the all-new Jesus Christ action figure playset. Ouch.
posted by Mobius1ski | 10:55 AM | Link | (2) comments |
Heil, how ya doing?
A Berlin cop has been suspended for using a Hitler salute which is now outlawed in Germany. Man, 60 years later and Hitler is still in the news.
posted by Benyamin | 9:45 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Pork chops
This has got to be treyfe.
posted by Benyamin | 9:41 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Mr. Miller goes to Washington
Jewish playwright Arthur Miller testified before Congress on Wednesday in backing legislation that would allow playwrights to join to negotiate a standard form contract for their work without violating antitrust laws. This is not the first time that Miller, the author of Death of a Salesman and The Crucible, has appeared before Congress. A half-century ago he refused to cooperate with the House's anti-communist campaign.
posted by Benyamin | 9:17 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Wednesday, April 28, 2004
Olsens love Jews
By defintion, a fantasy that's intangible is just that -- intangible. But it seems the Olsen twins -- who turn 18 in July, thank God) -- have come one step closer into the wet dream of every Jewish male. They told People magazine that they are dating Columbia University quarterback Matt Kaplan and David Katzenberg, son of DreamWorks co-founder Jeffrey Katzenberg. Man, if only my last name was Spielberg. Maybe then I'd have a chance.
posted by Benyamin | 11:20 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Fashion police
Just when you thought Michael Jackson couldn't get any weirder, it seems he does something else to solidify the wacko moniker. This time, it has to do with his clothes. The New York Daily News reports that Jackson has hired Nation of Islam leader Louis Farrakhan's personal designer to craft a new outfit for each day of his child molestation trial.
posted by Benyamin | 10:26 AM | Link | (0) comments |
From chains to links
Actor Jim Caviezel on first playing Jesus in The Passion of the Christ and then playing golf in the new film Bobby Jones: Stroke of Genius: "After getting whacked around a few times, I thought playing a little golf might be a nice change."
posted by Benyamin | 10:01 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Tuesday, April 27, 2004
The Russell Crowe Judaica Library
"Tough guy actor Russell Crowe was so upset by a fire-bombing at a Jewish elementary school in Montreal, he called the school to offer a donation to help rebuild its library, a school spokeswoman said on Tuesday."
posted by Mobius1ski | 5:20 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Rabbi finds AIDS cure
Thanks to the Jewschool blog for telling us about an African rabbi who claims to have found the cure for AIDS by combining several local herbs he dubs "Moses' divine Antacid powder."
posted by Benyamin | 10:28 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Raiders of the lost ark
This summer a U.S.-Turkish team of 10 explorers will attempt to do what dozens of explorers have tried before: locate Noah's Ark. If they succeed, their next mission will be to find a viable script for the in-limbo installment of the next Indiana Jones script.
posted by Benyamin | 12:23 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Monday, April 26, 2004
Card sharks
The Jewish Telegraphic Agency ran a story about rabbi trading cards, the Jewish equivalent of baseball cards. The money quote? "This isn't Hollywood; we're not dealing with models," says photographer Ed Bernstein. "It's very atypical for a rosh yeshiva to stop what he’s doing and pose for a photo." One rabbi made Bernstein promise to take a widow from his congregation out on a date before he agreed to pose.
posted by Benyamin | 1:22 PM | Link | (0) comments |
The tao of Seinfeld
Jerry Seinfeld, who turns 50 on Thursday, told the New York Post his thoughts on old age: "I love 50 -- my wonderful wife and two children have made these the best years of my life. On the other hand, I'm assuming it's pretty much a sprint to the coffin from here."
posted by Benyamin | 11:42 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Cash fight
Jewish gazillionaire Marc Cuban is starting his own Apprentice-style show called The Benefactor. Besides the competition between the two similar shows, Cuban has some pretty bad blood with Trump. For starters, he offered Apprentice runner-up Kwame Jackson a job. And now Cuban is dissing Trump on his personal Weblog. "You suggested our show was a duplicate of yours. It’s not. It won’t be. I wanted to make that perfectly clear."
posted by Benyamin | 9:54 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Jackson update
Michael Jackson has dropped his Orthodox attorney Benjamin Branfman. No news yet if the move was related to Jackson's close ties with the Nation of Islam. In other Jewish Jackson related news, Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, Jackson's former spiritual advisor, has gone back on the record about the latest developments in the Jackson case. "I have a lot of complaints about Michael Jackson," says Shmuley. "If I thought he was a pedophile, I would tell you. My complaints really revolve around what I consider to be his self-absorption, his belief in his own P.R. and his deification of self, and how he really began to believe he was the king of pop, and how he just couldn‘t be a bit more humble."
posted by Benyamin | 9:41 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Friday, April 23, 2004
She bangs
I wonder what the Torah says about this.
posted by Benyamin | 2:46 PM | Link | (0) comments |
The other Mein Kampf
In 1983, Stern magazine fell for one of the oddest hoaxes in modern history when it purchased what it thought was the rights to Hitler's personal diary. It wasn't his diary, and today the historical oddity sold at a Berlin auction for $7,700. It's good to see people are still making money off of Hitler.
posted by Benyamin | 2:29 PM | Link | (0) comments |
They said it
Richard Gere on President Bush: "One thing I've learned in my life is never to trust anyone who thinks that he exclusively has God on his side. Especially when he's the president of the United States."
posted by Benyamin | 1:27 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Passion tidal wave coming to Israel
It appears as though Israelis will get a chance to see The Passion of the Christ when it comes to Tel Aviv for a one-time only performance in the coming weeks. Bootleg DVDs and videocassettes of The Passion of the Christ have reportedly been selling briskly in the Palestinian territories. A pirated copy was recently screened for Palestinian Authority Chairman Yasser Arafat, who promptly pronounced the movie "historic and impressive."
posted by Benyamin | 1:25 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Thursday, April 22, 2004
Schindler's List, Part Deux?
Steven Spielberg and Ben Kingsley may be reteaming, but it's not for Schindler's List: Return to Auschwitz. Spielberg plans to start production in June and is eyeing actor Ben Kingsley for a role in the upcoming drama about the 1972 Munich Olympics, which will chronicle the Summer Games marred by the kidnapping and slaying of Israeli athletes by Palestinian militants, a DreamWorks studio spokeswoman said Wednesday. Take that, Mel!
posted by Benyamin | 9:19 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Wednesday, April 21, 2004
The firar's club
More than 8000 people have signed an online petition asking Mel Gibson to make a film about Saint Francis of Assisi. Don't they know his next project is going to be a film about the Maccabees.
posted by Benyamin | 10:43 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Be like me - a devout Christian
'80s TV icon Kirk Cameron (Growing Pains) is trying to convert people to Christianity on his Web site.
posted by Benyamin | 10:33 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Tuesday, April 20, 2004
Be more Jewish
Bret Carr's funny two minute Passion spoof entitled The Passion of the Heist has already helped his career. His independent film Lou has won him a distribution deal. For those of you who have yet to witness Carr's genius, log onto to passionoftheheist.com to see a faux audition for Christ killers in Gibson's Passion of the Christ and watch a faux Gibson tell Carr his not Jewish enough for the role. "I don't know whose Messiah you killed, but it's definitely not mine."
posted by Benyamin | 1:51 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Sunday, April 18, 2004
You're fired!
The last three elves at Father Christmas' official headquarters in Finland's Arctic have been fired as Santa Park grapples with its finances. Maybe they could use a good Jewish accountant.
posted by Benyamin | 9:44 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Saturday, April 17, 2004
Eat your milk and honey
You've heard of the Atkins Diet and the South Beach Diet. Well now comes the Maker's Diet, a new biblically correct health plan. "In the Bible, people didn't eat the garbage we eat," says author Jordan Rubin. That's right -- they ate forbidden fruit instead.
posted by Benyamin | 11:02 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Christ rocks, dude
It seems the latest trend among dancing teenagers is ... drumroll please ... booze-free nightclubs, where DJs spin and patrons shake in the name of Jesus Christ. Man, they're geniuses are marketing their religion.
posted by Benyamin | 9:19 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Wednesday, April 14, 2004
Roth wins .... zzzz...
Oprah Winfrey, Tim Allen and Sharon Lawrence all showed their support in Hollywood as the American Jewish Committee honored movie mogul Joe Roth with the Dorothy and Sherrill C. Corwin Human Relations Award. Roth, the creative force behind this year's snooze-inducing Academy Awards, is behind such midland fare as Mona Lisa Smile, Daddy Day Care, and Hollywood Homicide. What was the award for again?
posted by Benyamin | 6:45 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Dylan's secret
Legendary Jewish rocker Bob Dylan is hawking lingerie for Victoria's Secret. "I, for instance, am a man, and I can assure you that Bob Dylan is not what I'm looking for in a woman's undergarment," writes Seth Stevenson in Slate.
posted by Benyamin | 6:38 PM | Link | (0) comments |
The Sabbath clause
Taking a page out of the Evan and Jaron handbook, Madonna has switched her upcoming Ireland concert from Saturday to Sunday. Joe Deegan, an Irish priest, said the decision was insensitive in a country where 90 percent of the population is Roman Catholic. "The Lord's Day for a lot of people around this part of the world is Sunday and it seems a bit inconsiderate and insensitive that our religious beliefs are not taken into account," he said. According to the London Sun, Madonna will instead partake in a Shabbat dinner.
posted by Benyamin | 1:32 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Franken & Stewart's Air America Kibbutz Session
Check out Al Franken's brilliant interview (66MB ZIP containing 4 MP3s, c/o Matt Haughey) with Jon Stewart, where they discuss, among other things, Spielberg's Shoah Visual History Foundation, Holocaust humor, and other subjects of—er, Jewish interest.
posted by Mobius1ski | 1:11 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Thursday, April 08, 2004
Bunny bumpin'
Parents were outraged when a Pennsylvania church trying to teach about Jesus’ crucifixion performed an Easter show with actors whipping the Easter bunny and breaking eggs. Hey, at least it wasn't in Aramaic.
posted by Benyamin | 1:49 PM | Link | (0) comments |
Thursday, April 01, 2004
Give It Up For Brit Mila!
Circumcised men are 8 times less-likely to contract HIV. We knew a bris had to be good for something!
posted by Mobius1ski | 10:37 AM | Link | (0) comments |
A Shomer Shabbos Credit Card
"Religious entrepreneurs have found a new way to battle the opening of shops on the Sabbath. They are planning to soon issue a new credit card that will offer special benefits to anyone buying at store chains that keep the Sabbath."
posted by Mobius1ski | 10:37 AM | Link | (0) comments |
And the flag was still there
Michael Jackson continues to push the envelope of irony. After exiting a meeting with the Congressional Black Caucus, and while being flanked by bodyguards from the Nation of Islam, Jackson is seen waving an Israeli flag. Huh?
posted by Benyamin | 10:16 AM | Link | (0) comments |
Religious radio
Trying to parlay the intense media buzz of Jewish satirist Al Franken's new radio show, Rev. Jesse Jackson will be launching his own religious radio show to be broadcast on Sunday mornings. Ah, the voice of reason finally comes to the airwaves.
posted by Benyamin | 9:41 AM | Link | (0) comments |
The Rebbe and April Fools
A team of young rabbinical students ranging from 16 to 25 years of age have put together a $75,000 dollar motorcade in honor of the 102nd birthday of the Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneersohn this Thursday, April 1 (coinciding with the 11th day of the Hebrew month of Nissan). The parade consists of 54 "Mitzvah Tanks," motor homes converted into synagogues on wheels as first created by the Lubavitcher Rebbe in one of the many campaigns he initiated to bring the message of world peace to the man and woman on the street, especially through increasing in acts of goodness and kindness. We'll keep you posted if we find out this is just a big fat Lubavitch hoax.
posted by Benyamin | 9:11 AM | Link | (0) comments |
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