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| Friday, February 27, 2004 |
Queen of nice likes torture
Rosie O'Donnell, who speaks out vociferously against violence, apparently enjoyed Mel Gibson's crucifixion massacre The Passion of the Christ.
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Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Hitler has left the building. Well, ok, not Hitler. But the fictitious producers behind Springtime for Hitler are leaving the show. The Producers' stars Matthew Broderick and Nathan Lane will be ending their Broadway run on April 4th. No replacements have yet to be announced.
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What women want
Forlorn Jewish novelist became famous when her book Prozac Nation. Now she's trying to have lightning
strike twice with The Secret of Life, due in October, which publisher Ballantine is touting as having "amazing good advice for young women on how to live a full and satisfying life." Sign us up.
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| Thursday, February 26, 2004 |
Sign of the times
 The Lovingway United Pentecostal Church in Colorado isn't making a friends in the Denver Jewish community. The church posted a sign on the front of their property which states "Jews Killed the Lord Jesus". Paging Abe Foxman.
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Kiss my wiener
 This little gem comes from our friends over at Jewschool: This mezuzah answers to a "higher authority." Hebrew National—the company responsible for those not so very kosher hot dogs found in supermarkets and baseball arenas around the country—recently unveiled this ceramic mezuzah, designed by a former student of NYU's Parsons School of Design. Only $25, parchment not included (and properly noted).
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'Passion' paraphernalia
Okay, so you just walked out of a screening of The Passion of the Christ. What do you do now to keep the fun going? Purchase some Passion paraphernalia. A particularly popular item is a pendant fashioned from a single nail made of pewter and attached to a leather strap. So you can experience the crucifixion all day long.
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Prisoners with a 'Passion'
The award for the most off-color reaction to Mel Gibson's Jesus biopic goes to Amcha. They plan on holding a protest of the film by holding a protest with demonstrators dressed in concentration camp uniforms. "This film is born of the same theology that gave rise to the Holocaust. I am deeply concerned by this film and what may lie in store for Jews around the world following its release,? says Amcha's Rabbi Shmuel Herzfeld.
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Davening diva
 Sources say pop diva Mariah Carey has founda new religion -- Kabbalah. "It definitely looked like one of those Kabbalah bracelets," says a source who saw the singer sporting a red string recently. "They’re supposed to absorb negative energy, and Mariah's been surrounded by plenty of that over the last couple of years."
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Quote, unquote
"If [Mel] Gibson's movie about Christ is anything like 'Braveheart,' this is going to be a really important movie! It's impossible to make a movie based on the Bible and not upset the Jewish people" -- David Carradine in Videoscope magazine.
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Rooney's roast
60 Minutes' Andy Rooney dissed Mel Gibson and Rev. Pat Robertson by calling them "wackos". Robertson actually took it as a compliment. He responded to Rooney's comments by saying, "Mel Gibson has, without a doubt, created the finest motion picture on the life of Christ of all time," Robertson said. "I am very happy to be linked by Andy Rooney to a talented genius of the order of Mel Gibson."
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| Monday, February 23, 2004 |
Not so 'Passion'ate
Just saw Mel Gibson's The Passion of the Christ and I feel like I want to kill a Jew. My complete review will be posted in the next day or two.
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Internal studies
Jewish intern Monica Lewinsky says she feels empathetic with that other intern. "I really just felt empathic for the girl, the young woman, and for her family and at the same time I was really outraged because I thought once again we have politics dipping into someone’s personal life and whether it's true or not, it shouldn't matter" Lewinsky said about the intern who says she had an affair with Democratic front-runner John Kerry. "It should just be left alone."
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| Wednesday, February 18, 2004 |
What do you have to say for yourself?
After a couple weeks on the fritz, our comment system is now working again. So start rifling through some old entries and let us know what you think. Thanks.
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Who's Jew on The Simpsons
"I'm not gay, but I'm Jewish, which is about the same thing. We've both been persecuted for centuries—by our mothers." — Simpsons writer and producer Mike Reiss, addressing Cornell students Tuesday night, at a Hillel-sponsored event.
Beyond his own Jewishness, Reiss also revealed that more than half the show's talent are Jews, including three of the six main voice actors. "Apu, the Hindu," said Reiss, "well, he's a Jew too!"
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Jews do control the media
 Riding the wealthy coattails of NBC's wildly successful Donald Trump reality show The Apprentice, show creator Mark Burnett is speaking with CBS about a West Coast version featuring the Jewish triumverate of Jeffrey Katzenberg, David Geffen, and Steven Spielberg.
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First lady has 'Passion'
 First Lady Laura Bush told a group of reporters that she is looking forward to seeing Mel Gibson's controversial Jesus biopic The Passion of the Christ. "I think it sounds very interesting and I'd like to see it," said Bush, herself a devout Christian. WOnder if she gets some kind of dignitary discount at the multiplex.
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Don't capture the Friedmans
Two men who say they were abused by Jesse Friedman don't want the documentary about their story to win an Oscar. Capturing the Friedmans, about a Long Island Jewish family in crisis, was nominated for Best Documentary at the Academy Awards later this month. The documentary has already won the grand prize at the 2003 Sundance Film Festival and was named best nonfiction film by the New York Film Critics Circle.
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The worst legal defense ever
 39-year-old U.K. homemaker Helen Omar was arrested for attacking two security guards, shouting abuses at them, and kicking one in the shin and another in the groin, she blamed Madonna. Apparently, a hypnotist put Omar under a trance and told her to act like the pop diva. That's when the attacks happened. As of this report, police were still wondering why Omar wasn't sporting a red bracelet or proselytizing Kabbalah.
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| Tuesday, February 17, 2004 |
From playing the lord to playing golf
James Caviezel, who portrays Jesus in Mel Gibson's film The Passion of the Christ will be portraying the god of golf for his next movie role in Bobby Jones, Stroke of Genius. "I went from playing the Messiah to playing the messiah of golf," he told the New York Daily News.
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| Monday, February 16, 2004 |
Comedic 'Curb'
An article in Salon today asks the quintessential question: Is Larry David an everyman or an annoying man? "Over the years, though, David has transformed slowly but surely from an Everyman into an unrepentant jerk. Instead of sympathizing with David as an extremely frank Jewish guy among a sea of bullshitting gentiles and brown-nosing Hollywood types, he's increasingly presented to us as freakishly uncaring." We think, as the article concludes as well, that regardless he's incredibly funny.
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| Sunday, February 15, 2004 |
Cross promotional
Christian rock singer Stacie Orrico thinks that Britney Speaars and Christina Aguilera promote "degrading" sexual behavior to their prepubescent mostly female teeny-bopper audience. "The reason that I don't dress trashy is that I'm trying to set an example for little girls," says Orrico, who is also, not surprisingly, promoting her new album. "From the time they're seven or eight years old, (girls) are being taught that the only thing that makes them special and beautiful is their sexuality, and I think that's wrong." Well, that's the Christian perspective. As for the Jewish side of things, Shlock Rock could not be reached for comment.
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| Thursday, February 12, 2004 |
Even people who work for Heeb don't like it
It seems Heeb Magazine has gone a little too far in offending people this time. Susan Blond, who has helped the magazine with their PR and marketing efforts, has abruptly left her post in response to an off-color photo spread in the new issue featuring the magazine mocking Mel Gibson and the last 12 hours of Jesus' life. Asked who will be offended, Blond answered: "Any Jew, any Catholic, and anyone who has any taste." One picture in the photo spread features a Jewish prayer shawl being used as Jesus' loincloth and another depicted the Virgin Mary with nipple rings. Josh Neuman, Heeb's editor, doesn't think the photos are anything out of the ordinary. "It's what you'd expect from Heeb magazine," he said. Why anyone makes a big deal about a three-year-old magazine that has only published four issues is beyond us.
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Law and order
Our favorite millionaire business tycoon to make fun is back in the news again. Abe Hirschfeld, who's already served two years in prison for plotting the attempted murder of a former business partner, is now being slapped with a $10 million sexual harassment suit briught by his former personal assistant. For those who are not familiar with the wacky Hirschfeld, he claims he invented the parking garage.
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Spears' spirituality
Britney Spears is finding religion -- again. Despite concerted efforts by her friend Madonna to come over to the Kabbalah side, Spears and her mom were spotted crying at a recent sermon at the Faithful Central Bible Church in Inglewood, California. Rabbis take note: A good speech will get Britney in the door.
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| Wednesday, February 11, 2004 |
High price of prayer
Maine resident Richard Albert got fined $10,000 for going to church. Find out why.
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Pouncing Pope
This from Reuters: "Thousands of angry Roman Catholics have written to Britain's BBC complaining about a planned cartoon show mocking the Pope as a puerile preacher on a pogo-stick, the broadcaster said Tuesday." The Pope as a puerile preacher on a pogo-stick? Wethinks the author may have been a little alliteration happy.
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Rewriting history
As it turns out, the three wise men in the Nativity story may not have been wise or men for that matter. A committee met in England this week to revise parts of the King James Bible which thought were mistranslated. So does that mean they were dumb blondes instead?
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Let there be light
Thanks to our friends over at the Protocols blog for bringing this to, um, light. The new KosherLamp is on the market. The device, which allows you to turn off and on an electric light on Shabbat, comes complete with rabbinic approval. All for the low cost of $24.95. Truth is, it's actually not such a bad idea.
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| Tuesday, February 10, 2004 |
The fast and the furious
 Mel Gibson is taking some very unorthdox approaches in promoting his new film The Passion of the Christ. Bobby Labonte will be promoting the film on the hood of his racecar in this Sunday’s Daytona 500. "It's a chance to get the word out," Labonte said about the ad on his car. "Someone who is curious about Jesus and has never been saved sees the race and says, 'Hmmm, I'd like to see what that's about.' ... Maybe we can change their minds."
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Gibson's wife going to hell
It looks like there's no salvation for Mel Gibson's better half. Even the director of The Passion of the Christ, thinks his wife -- a non-Catholic -- is going to rot in hell. "There is no salvation for those outside the Church," Gibson told Australia's Herald Sun. "I believe it ... Put it this way. My wife is a saint. She’s a much better person than I am. Honestly. She’s, like, Episcopalian, Church of England. She prays, she believes in God, she knows Jesus, she believes in that stuff. And it’s just not fair if she doesn’t make it, she’s better than I am. But that is a pronouncement from the chair. I go with it." Talk about an Eishet Chayil.
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| Monday, February 09, 2004 |
Muslim matchmaking 2.0
JDate, you better watch your back. Following in the trend of having virtual matchmakers, the Muslim community is moving into the world of online dating. One of the entries on MuslimMatch.com reveals that a 34 year-old Jordanian woman who recently moved to the United States is looking for a "Jordanian or Palestinian [man], educated, responsible, religious, fears god, nice, out going, fun to be with, dependable, warm and kind," and describes herself as "a good muslim wife to start the perfect family!!!!!!!!!" Sounds eerily familair to some of the entries we saw on JDate.
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Dream catcher
A man who went with 100 of his friends to blow up Adolf Hitler with a bomb on July 20, 1944 is having nightmares about the ill-fated assassination attempt. Seriously.
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Ethnic cleansing
Numerous family members of Michael Jackson told MSNBC that they want Michael to break off his ties with the Nation of Islam. They feel it's "bringing too much of a negative light to Michael." Controversial Nation of Islam leader Louis Farrakhan had his head up his ass and couldn't be reached for comment.
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Come fly the friendly skies
Passengers on a cross-country flight from Los Angeles to New York were startled when the captain asked all the Christians on board to raise their hands. An American Airlines pilot, whos name was not released, asked his fellow Christians to talk to others about their faith. One passenger said that the pilot called non-Christians "crazy." Some passengers were so afraid that they tried calling for help on their cell phones. There was no comment from the Hare Krishnas waiting to greet the plane upon its arrival.
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| Friday, February 06, 2004 |
Save Me, Jeebus!
A synagogue in Westwood, California, is offering a course in Torah-learning which centers around themes presented on The Simpsons. The Simpsons from Sinai: A New Look at God, Judaism and the Torah will "have students watch one episode each evening and then discuss its theological components."
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| Thursday, February 05, 2004 |
Mary: Mel Gibson is not an anti-Semite
Maia Morgenstern, who plays Mary in Mel Gibson's upcoming Jesus biopic, is defending her director. "Mel Gibson is an artist, a director. He never imposed his religious convictions on anyone," says Morgenstern who is Jewish and the daughter of Holocaust survivors. Morgenstern's Romanian mother, who lost her own father in Auschwitz, visited her daughter on the set of The Passion of the Christ. Not being familiar with many movies, the mother excitedly told her friends that her daughter was filming with "Gib Melson." Seriously.
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| Wednesday, February 04, 2004 |
Move over, Mel
Gossip column "Page Six" says a new film is in the works that makes Mel Gibson's Jesus movie look like a Disney flick. It's called "Lord of the Undead" and portrays Jesus as the leader of a horde of zombies. "I've played a lot of evil characters, but I never thought I'd get to kick Christ's a- - in a movie," said the film's star, Debbie Rochon. Wonder what the Catholic Church will think of that.
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Kosher hoop-la
The New York Post reports that New Jersey Nets owner Bruce Ratner was seen dining with New York's Jewish mayor Michael Bloomberg and Assembly Speaker Sheldon Silver at upscale kosher steakhouse Prime Grill in Manhattan discussing the potential of kosher food at Nets games. Hebrew National, which is technically not even kosher, was responding to a higher authority and could not be reached for comment.
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Jesus gets cut
Mel Gibson has decided to delete a controversial scene in his upcoming Jesus biopic The Passion of the Christ. Caving into pressure from Jewish groups, a close associate of the Australian director told the New York Times that a scene in the film, in which the Jewish high priest Caiaphas calls down a kind of curse on the Jewish people by declaring of the Crucifixion, "His blood be on us and on our children," will not be in the movie's final version. Jewish groups hope that if continue to pester the Mad Max star, then eventually he will continue to delete scenes until there is nothing left of the film.
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Double duty
Our buddy Etan G is on a roll. Last week, he took home a bunch of loot on Shop Till Your Drop. Now comes word that he will not only be seen but also heard in the direct-to-video basketball documentary "1 Love" directed by Leon Gast (When We Were Kings). The Jewish rapper's music can be heard on the soundtrack. First music, now movies -- this guy is turning into J.Lo.
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The kallah's collection
 For those of you who were invited to the upcoming nuptials of former 90210 star Tori Spelling, she's registered for a $2800 menorah at Tiffany. If that's out of your price range, she's also registered online at WilliamSonoma.com. Although the Jewish bride registered for a plethora of gifts there, there was no sign of separate dishes for milk and meat. But she did register for a $6 citrus trumpet. Maybe she plans on using it as a gragger on Purim.
Postscript: When we logged on to William Sonoma to purchase the citrus trupmet, we noticed that somebody else -- perhaps a real invited guest -- had already purchased it for her. So we bought her a vegetable scooper that she registered for instead. We signed the card, "From your friends and fans at Jewsweek Magazine." We'll keep you posted and let you know if she sends us a thank-you card.
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Quote, unquote
"I don't know if I will ever work again. I've said that this is a career killer, and it could well be, but that doesn't matter because I don't care" -- Mel Gibson discussing "The Passion of Christ" on EWTN Global Catholic Network.
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Keeping abreast
In a what can only be described as having the shrewd business acumen and sheer chutzpah of a Jewish businessman, AOL is reportedly asking for a refund for sponsoring the Super Bowl halftime show which featured a bare-breasted Janet Jackson. We're not sure whether to congratulate them or despise them.
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German invasion
 Believe it or not, a German theater company is actually eager to bring Mel Brook's Hitler farce The Producers to Germany. The 77-year-old Brooks said Monday that he'd include Germany in the musical's worldwide tour "if they're young enough to ride with the punches." In other Producers news, Variety reports that actress-of-the-moment Nicole Kidman has been cast opposite Matthew Broderick and Nathan Lane as sexy and sultry Ulla in the big screen version of the play. Due to scheduling conflicts and script revisions, Filming is set to begin in February 2005 with a December 2005 release date. Can you say Yuletide for Hitler?
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| Monday, February 02, 2004 |
Thou shalt not steal
Apparently, the pen is mightier than the sword. To ensure that they indeed scared the bejesus out of their victim, a group of robbers put down their guns and made the priest they were stealing from swear on a bible that he had in fact handed over all his money. In a related story, Jewish fundraisers released a statement saying they had discovered new ways to increase revenue.
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French officials have opened an investigation into 